Whenever people ask me why I was with Adrian, the first boyfriend I had in Australia (10 years ago now!!), I say “he made me laugh”.
I’m not lying – Adrian and I are great friends now and he still has the ability to make me laugh, as evidenced by his take on poor Michael Jackson’s death. (Adrian is such a fan of MJ, so am I, but not like him).
Adrian and I having phone conversation:
Shan: Adrian, I think i have someone at work who loves MJ more than you do.
Adrian: I don’t #%@$# think so.
Shan: no seriously. you had a bit of a cry in your car but this dude cried till 3pm and had to leave work!
Adrian: that’s not because he’s a bigger fan, that’s coz he’s a girly girl. I ain’t no girly girl. I’m a man, and I take pain on the INSIDE.
Shan: umm, this guy had people calling to give him condolences.
Adrian: hey. I had smses from france, from america, places i’ve never even been. didn’t you see my facebook? what’s wrong with you?! how could you say that? a bigger fan? what? i’m the biggest fan there is. i’m not even going to respond to that.
Shan: (giggling uncontrollably)
Adrian: I mean seriously. I have a life sized cardboard cutout of MJ. you’ve seen it. it’s bigger than you. you tell this guy I’m a bigger fan. YOU TELL HIM. TELL HIM NOW.
Shan: (tears running down cheeks) I thought you weren’t going to respond to…
Adrian: Sharon, you ask him. you ask him if he has a Thriller jacket framed and mounted on his wall. in his living room. coz i do. you know i do. tell me you remember it.
Shan: how could i forget?!
Adrian: you ask him, if he has a Thriller jacket on his wall. you show him. the photos are on my facebook. i framed that thing. it’s on my WALL, in my LIVING ROOM. and you ask him about the LA GEAR limited edition shoes. ask him if he has them. I HAVE THEM.
Shan: ok, i’ll ask…
Adrian (not even pausing for breath): and you ask him what those shoes were called. you ask him. they’ve got special names coz they’re special editions. you ask him what they’re called. in fact i”ll tell you. the boys shoes are Billies and the girls ones are Billy Jeans. I know. You know why i know? coz i’m a true fan.
Shan: (hysterically laughing)
Adrian: and you know what? he thinks he’s a fan coz he’s seen the white socks and the glove. yeah. big deal. you and everyone else. does he HAVE a glove? I have a glove. it’s sparkly. you tell this guy. it’s bedazzled. HE’LL be bedazzled. uh huh. ask him. I’LL GIVE HIM A TRUE FAN.